Post by Grand Lunar on Nov 10, 2007 15:52:59 GMT -4
As this is a bit of fun about HBs, I'm not sure if this should go here. I'm doing this for laughs, hence the reason it's going here.
For a no good reason, I speculated on how hoax believers would manage a trip to the moon, if they had the resources.
So, here's my speculation on such a trip.
Given it involves thinking from the HB crowds, expect plot holes the size of Ganymede.
Rather than preform LOR, they build a tail sitter in LEO.
The task takes months, as they use heavy steel components, hydraulic landing gear, and plate steel for the hull, like a destroyer.
To finish it off, they then conduct many flights to tack on enough lead plates until they have 2 meter thick shielding.
Incidentally, they use the space shuttle to build the rocket, as HBs don't think the shuttle was fake.
The David Percy crowd is in charge of this department, though, and so they stick the shuttle on top of a Saturn 5 rocket (whose plans they received in secret by sympathetic pro-Apollo guys that want to see the HBs go to the moon). Why do they do this? Because, according to Percy, it's cheaper than using the SRBs and ET ( ).
Because the HBs don't trust scientists data on the Van Allen Belts, they blast out of orbit through the thickest part of the belt.
Of course, they do get sick, but they attribute it to bad food and gas.
The HBs attempt a landing, but find that they can't manage it, because they didn't install a throttle on their engines.
So, they just shut them on and off until to control the landing.
Once on the lunar surface, hoax believer Moon Man is the first out. Believing on doesn't need a space suit on the moon, he becomes the first fatality on the moon.
The other HBs use space shuttle EVA suits, again because they don't think the shuttle was hoaxed.
They are immediately surprised that there is no blast crater, and so are told to lie about that when they get back.
They try to jump very high, but get frustrated when controllers tell them they don't look any different than Apollo astronauts.
They then decide that their inability to jump high is due to hypnotic control by the US govt.
The HBs return to Earth, with photos and moon rocks.
Once back on Earth, HBs are frustrated when they see that attempts to get images of stars in the same frame as the lunar surface all look like a white surface with salt overhead.
Also frustrating is when they see that their lunar samples match those of Apollo's samples.
Faced with defeat, the HBs chalk up their landing as a giant hoax to distract the pro-Apollo crowd.
The End!
How long do you think this story becomes a best seller?
For a no good reason, I speculated on how hoax believers would manage a trip to the moon, if they had the resources.
So, here's my speculation on such a trip.
Given it involves thinking from the HB crowds, expect plot holes the size of Ganymede.
Rather than preform LOR, they build a tail sitter in LEO.
The task takes months, as they use heavy steel components, hydraulic landing gear, and plate steel for the hull, like a destroyer.
To finish it off, they then conduct many flights to tack on enough lead plates until they have 2 meter thick shielding.
Incidentally, they use the space shuttle to build the rocket, as HBs don't think the shuttle was fake.
The David Percy crowd is in charge of this department, though, and so they stick the shuttle on top of a Saturn 5 rocket (whose plans they received in secret by sympathetic pro-Apollo guys that want to see the HBs go to the moon). Why do they do this? Because, according to Percy, it's cheaper than using the SRBs and ET ( ).
Because the HBs don't trust scientists data on the Van Allen Belts, they blast out of orbit through the thickest part of the belt.
Of course, they do get sick, but they attribute it to bad food and gas.
The HBs attempt a landing, but find that they can't manage it, because they didn't install a throttle on their engines.
So, they just shut them on and off until to control the landing.
Once on the lunar surface, hoax believer Moon Man is the first out. Believing on doesn't need a space suit on the moon, he becomes the first fatality on the moon.
The other HBs use space shuttle EVA suits, again because they don't think the shuttle was hoaxed.
They are immediately surprised that there is no blast crater, and so are told to lie about that when they get back.
They try to jump very high, but get frustrated when controllers tell them they don't look any different than Apollo astronauts.
They then decide that their inability to jump high is due to hypnotic control by the US govt.
The HBs return to Earth, with photos and moon rocks.
Once back on Earth, HBs are frustrated when they see that attempts to get images of stars in the same frame as the lunar surface all look like a white surface with salt overhead.
Also frustrating is when they see that their lunar samples match those of Apollo's samples.
Faced with defeat, the HBs chalk up their landing as a giant hoax to distract the pro-Apollo crowd.
The End!
How long do you think this story becomes a best seller?